Abuse is done in isolation. Recovery happens best in the context of a relationship with a community of healthy, supportive people. Having a support person and people that could understand what I was going through as I did the hard work to recover from the many traumas that I had experienced was paramount in my healing. My husband has been my biggest support over the last 34 years. My therapist and other survivor friends that I have had over the years have also been helpful as I have integrated my internal and external realities. Having the support we need helps us to gain a sense of self awareness and understanding of ourselves. It creates a sense of belonging and helps as a survivor to know I wasn’t different in a bad way and to know I wasn’t alone. It’s just as important to give support to our inner people. My support has been my husband, my therapists, and for the last 5 years Discovering MErcy.
Support groups can also be a source of healing that makes survivors feel seen and understood rather than alone. Many survivors of abuse often have difficulty expressing and validating their thoughts and emotions. It helps to have someone to talk to who will listen and allow you to open up about what happened and how the abuse is affecting your daily life in the present.
The trauma of being abused through childhood sexual abuse, rape, sexual assault, physical abuse, ritual abuse and mind control can be shattering, leaving you feeling scared, ashamed, and alone or plagued by nightmares, flashbacks, and other unpleasant memories. Having support can alleviate fear. Having someone that can give you empathy can help you to overcome shame. Having a support person who believes you and doesn't judge you or blame you for what happened to you in the past and for you are going through now as a result of the abuse can help you to feel empowered and accepted. It is important to know that you were not to blame for the abuse that was done to you. It is equally important to have others who will support you and love you through your recovery and can remind you that the abuse was not your fault. Having support helps to regain your sense of safety and trust in people again.
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